Armpits and dead people
by Mopkin – April 16, 2001
filed under News
This just in:
Secret Deodorant has just revealed three new scents: ambition, optimism, and genuine. Is it just me or are these not scents? I've never felt that anyone smelled particularly ambitious, or optimistic for that matter. "Genuine Scent" on the other hand sounds dangerous. Do you want your girlfriend's armpit smelling like genuine armpit? I wouldn't. Especially not if she spent money to get it to smell that way. If you are a "genuine" person, doesn't using this deodorant make you less genuine? My head hurts.
Oops! It seems a British secret agent left his laptop full of information on new weapon systems in a taxi. My bad! The Dell Latitude laptop is just the latest one misplaced by a British secret agent. The last one was filled with Northern Ireland secrets. How could this be happening? I think I uncovered the reason on the internet. I have it right here on my laptop! Hey...wait a sec...????
The number of organs donated by living people rose greatly in 2000. More than 5,500 people gave away a kidney or a piece of their liver last year, and over 55% did it knowingly. But what is truly shocking is that organ donation from the dead, has hardly risen in recent years. Analysts were split over what the reasons were for this lack of caring among the dead. Most, however, pointed to the Elian crisis. |
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original URL: mopkin.com/columns/article.cfm?id=52